I’m not finished transferring my old blog entries yet, but I can’t let this one go.
So, there’s this family in eastern PA that called the media to complain that the local ShopRite supermarket bakery won’t put their 3-year-olds’s full name on his birthday cake. Sounds terrible, right? But wait. What’s the kid’s name anyway?
Holy crap!?!?!? Why would you name your kid Adolf Hitler!?!?!?! The father Heath Campbell said his ancestors are German, he liked the name and “no one else in the world would have that name.” He claims he can’t understand what all the fuss is about.
So is Heath just a product of the American school system? Did he just make an innocent mistake naming little Adolf Hitler due to his lack of historical knowledge? Well Heath, what did you name your other kids?
Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell
JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell
Those also seem like odd choices— Wait! Is that your car!?!?
And what’s that on your hand?
That’s it!!! You’re full of crap! You couldn’t have just changed you own name, you bastard. You had to make your kids pariahs by giving them overtly racist names! Then, you call the news the moment someone dared to mention the obvious. I’m sure there’s some weasly legal reason you can’t be charged with child abuse, but you are abusing your kids. There’s a special place in Hell for people like you. I hope you don’t have to wait too long to get there.
And little Adolf, Aryan and Hinler… once you’re 18 you can change your names for under 100 bucks. Hopefully you won’t be too screwed up to do it.
Edit: This entry got me so freakin angry I forgot to link to the original story. Oops! Here it is: Hitler Cake